You give me the whole damn zoo
This scene on Grey's always gives me butterflies in my stomach. That initial phase where everything is new and uncertain, every turn is a surprise and any gesture is heart-warming.
People are really romantic about beginning of things
An endless world of possibilities and just filled with hopeful dreams. A new adventure you are embarking on. But you are still you.
And watching that made me more aware. More aware that the initial romance and butterflies seemingly present in initial dating phases haven't just turn into familiarity.
It just presents itself with less intensity as habits and certainty falls into place.
That feeling when you see your crush. Or when his eyes meet yours. That small flutter radiating from within. Your heart beat quickens by just a touch, and your lips part. Does he like you? Right about now, you can't think of anyone else.
That feeling before the first date. Walking around the whole day, giddy with excitement. Time passes too slow; yet, too quickly all at once. What lipstick matches that dress? Does it matter? The same flutter now further amplified.
That feeling when he picks you up. A whiff of his scent, a hand on your back. Your senses come alive and you forget to breathe. The flutter has turned into a whirlpool of stamping elephants as of right now.
That feeling when you watch a movie together. It's probably a good show but you dk what's showing. You're too acutely aware of the fact that he is right beside you. Your arms are touching, barely, but touching. It's simple and yet; so exhilarating. Can he hear your heart beating?
That feeling when he holds your hand for the first time. He grabs it and squeezes it ever so slightly. Your stomach flips, your heart in your throat, you give a squeeze back. It's a silent announcement to the entire world and a silly grin makes its way onto your face.
That feeling before, after and during the first kiss. Time seemed to stop and you seemed to have develop tunnel vision suddenly - all you can see is him. The pause before the kiss and it's as though you're at the top of the roller coaster ride. Your stomach prepares for the extreme somersault and you take in a deep breathe. That moment when the kiss takes over and you come alive. The heart palpitations, the slightly damp palms, the light-headedness and the weak, weak knees.
Every time we are out and he comes right next to me to hold my hands. Every time he looks at me and smile. Every time he texts me to check if I have had my food or just to talk to me. Every single damn time he kisses me.
Do we eventually get used to the flutters because we know what's going to happen? I know he is going to kiss me goodbye before leaving for work. Why does that lessen the intensity of the flutter? It shouldn't. I shouldn't let it.
👧🏻: Babe, do you still get butterflies in your stomach?
👦🏻: I've never understood that sentence. I have never understood what that feels like.
👧🏻: (kinda confused) Its like a sensation right from your tummy that makes you feel funny! Like, your heart beats faster and your palms get sweaty and you're just nervous!
👦🏻: My palms are sweaty all the time (sweaty palm issues HAHA) and I only feel like that when I get food poisoning
👧🏻: You're so weird
👦🏻: Well, I do get a feeling. Idk if it's what you're talking about.
👧🏻: (awaiting response from suspected robot-husband)
👦🏻: I get this warm feeling right in my tummy, and then it spreads though my entire body, makes me kinda nua at the same time and gives me goosebumps.
👧🏻: When was the last time you felt that? (Also not sure at this point if he was just feeling ill HAHAHA)
👦🏻: When I hugged you in the cinema last night.
Love is mysterious and unique. It doesn't fit into a mold and it doesn't give in. It doesn't care what others feel or how society works. Love is a four-letter word that just really doesn't give a fuck. Love is blind and fierce; emotional and blunt. It causes a physical and emotional reaction and hits you like a truck. It messes with your mind and your body. It eats into your soul and drives you insane.
Find someone who does that. Find someone who makes your heart beat, gets your palm sweaty, speeds up your heart rate and weaken your knees. Find someone who does that no matter the amount of time passed.
🎼 Don't need no butterflies when you give me the whole damn zoo 🎶